How Long, O Lord? (Psalm 13)

Psalm 13, like Psalm 121, is considered to be the "keeping psalm"; this psalm is the one of fear of forsaking. It is a psalm of a tired person who is afraid that God may have forsaken him. And it seems that his tiredness lasted for so long and he became troubled because of its length. That’s why he cries to the Lord saying: “How long” and repeats it four times: “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, Having sorrow in my heart daily? How long will my enemy be exalted over me?”

This psalm was said by Prophet David when he was being pursued by King Saul. This evil king envied him and feared losing his kingdom because of him. That is why he was pursuing David from one wilderness to another, from one cave to another and from one place to another aiming to kill him by all means, if he could. The war was unequal. Saul had no objection in killing David if he fell into his hands, and he tried that more than once. Yet David could not kill his enemy each time he fell in his hands. That is because David was the anointed of the Lord, and David’s conscience did not allow him to stretch out his hand against Saul, seeing he is the anointed of the Lord (1S 24:6) (1S 26:9, 11). Thus he said in his psalm, “How long will my enemy be exalted over me?”

It is a psalm that starts with worrying and sadness and ends with joy and praising. It is like other psalms by David, which start with sadness or fear. During prayer of the psalm, he feels that the Lord is answering his prayer and feels His work for him, so his request turns to thanking or joy and praising. Here he starts the psalm with the sentence “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me?” The Lord has never forgotten him, but because of David's troubles, he had that feeling. He feels the Lord had forsaken him because the duration of the trial had gone on for a long time.

Here he is, being pursued by a king and his army, until he comes close to despair and got scared of falling in Saul’s hands. And if David recalled his experiences, he would have known that the Lord did not forget him when he fought against a lion and a bear as he was keeping the sheep. The Lord was with him, and thus he was able to kill both the lion and the bear. (1 Sam 17:36) The Lord was with him also and did not forget him when he went to fight the champion Goliath and he prevailed with only a stone struck by his sling. (1 Sam 17:51) The Lord was with him and did not forget him when Saul was after him trying to kill him, even as Jonathan was always taking David's side and saving him from his father, Saul, and so did Michal as well. (1 Sam 19:12)

We might struggle with the idea that God has forgotten us, because we forgot God’s previous benefits to us. Or if we forgot His saying: “Can a woman forget her nursing child? Surely they may forget, Yet I will not forget you.” (Is 49:15)

The Holy Bible tells us stories about the Lord never forgetting any of his flock no matter how long it takes. And what we have to do is to never lose hope, no matter how long the wait gets. The sick man at Bethesda (Jn 5) spent 38 years in his sickness, yet he was waiting for an angel to stir up the water in the pool so that he steps in and be healed, and the Lord did not forget him, although 38 years had passed, and He healed him. And the woman whom Satan had bound for 18 years, whose story was mentioned in the Gospel of Luke (Lk 13:10-13) - the Lord did not forget her after all those long years, and He laid His hand on her and healed her and she became straight. Her staying for 18 years in the sickness did not ever mean that the Lord has forgotten her!

The same also can be realized in the creation story. As the Bible says “The earth was without form, and void; and darkness was on the face of the deep.” (Gn 1:2) And in spite of that formlessness and darkness, God did not abandon it, but rather it was said that “the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.” Then God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. And God divided the light from the darkness. And God kept taking care of that Earth until it became that beautiful Earth that we live on and that poets praise in their poems.

Another example is our father Abraham, the father of fathers, and his wife Sarah, and how both of them were patient so that God gives them a Seed, until Abraham was a hundred years old and Sarah was ninety and she said: “After I have grown old, shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?" (Gn 18:12) Even at that age, God did not forget about them and He gave them what He has promised them.

Also, David was never forgotten by God. He handed him the kingdom finally. After many tribulations, the personality of this lad grew from a boy who was “ruddy, with bright eyes” (1S 16:12), and about whom King Saul asked “whose son this young man is?” (1S 17:56). Tribulations and trials refined him, as did experience and days. He became no more a young man when he took over the kingdom. David asks, saying: “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me?” No, had the Lord forgotten you, you would have perished a long time ago. The same would have happened if He had hidden his face from you.

No, he had inscribed you on His palm (Is 49:16), and His eyes are fixed on you from the morning watch until night. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it shall not come near you. (Ps 91:7)

But God allowed some tribulations at the hand of Saul to befall David so that he would benefit spiritually and be humble after her killed the bear and the lion and had triumphed over Goliath. So, through pain and tribulation, he did not becoe proud in his heart.  David used to say to the Lord: “But I am poor and needy; Make haste to me, O God!” (Ps 70:5) He was not tempted by the women singing “Saul has slain his thousands, And David his ten thousands." (1S 18:6, 7).

These tribulations that labored David, were not only beneficial in giving him humbleness, and in giving him toughness of men after his softness as a lad, but it also taught him prayer, and added to his flute and harp a spiritual depth that he benefited from, and we did too. And his psalms became an example from which generations learned prayers in different life circumstances.

These tribulations also taught him how to bear trials, be patient and wait on the Lord, although under the tribulation's pressure, David was crying: "How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?" The English translation of “forever” means "endlessly or all the time". Yet in another place, David says: “Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!” (Ps 27:14) He meant wait on the Lord in trust and strength, and not in weakness, despair or collapse. And he shows his experience in this saying: “My soul waits for the Lord more than those who watch for the morning.” (Ps 130)

In his tribulation, David says “How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily?” He tells his experiences in his tribulation and mentions it in front of God: in all his tiring, he had thoughts and plans in his mind about what he should do to survive his tribulation, and they were of no use to him at all. The pain was also laboring in his heart without changing the reasons behind his pain and thus he was waiting on the Lord.

The Lord’s disciples were on the ship, frightened by the wind and waves until they were troubled and thought that the Lord forgot them as well. They said to Him, in their tribulation: “do You not care that we are perishing?" (Mk 4:38) It is human weakness in the time of trial. No doubt, the Lord cared for them. So He arose and rebuked the wind and the sea, and there was a great calm.

So do not say to the Lord “Why do you forget me”, but say: “Forgive me, O Lord, I who forget You. I forget Your love and care for me in times when tribulations are pressuring me.” Therefore we should not allow tribulations to come between us and God that keep His love from us; rather, we should bring God between us and tribulations so that He keeps their pressures from us.

He says “How long will my enemy be exalted over me?” Truly, he who keeps looking at what his enemies do is troubled the most. He would do better to look at God who saves him from his enemies. That is what the Prophet David said in the great Psalm: “Princes persecute me without a cause… I rejoice at Your word as one who finds great treasure.” (Ps 118) Here, he did not pay attention to princes’ persecution but rather was consumed with God’s words, so he rejoiced for he found great treasures.

David, however, leaves those enemies aside and says: "Consider and hear me, O Lord my God." Here, his situation changes completely. The phrase “Consider me” is a reply to what he said before: “How long will You hide Your face from me”. And the phrase “hear me” is a reply to what he said before “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?” It seems that prayer has changed David. After his mind was bound in his own counsel and his heart bound in his pain, he started looking at God and putting his worries on Him so that God took him out of his sorrows. David uses the phrase “O Lord my God” - this is the same phrase that Thomas the Apostle used when the Lord rescued him from his doubt. (Jn 20:28)

After that, David says: “Enlighten my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death…” And with the phrase “Enlighten my eyes,” he means his spiritual insight. It is as if David confesses that his insight was not enlightened when he said “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me?!”

This supplication reminds us of the story of Gehazi when he was afraid and troubled when he saw the enemies surrounding the city. The Prophet Elisha then prayed for him saying: “Lord, I pray, open his eyes that he may see that those who are with us are more than those who are with them.” (2K 6:16, 17) It is faith that enlightens our eyes when they are surrounded with a fog of despair and fear so that they are unable to see God’s help that surrounds them in times of trouble.

So, David says to the Lord enlighten my eyes; enlighten my eyes to see the Lord always before me, because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved (Ps 16:8). Enlighten my eyes to know that I have done wrong when I said “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me.”  Enlighten my eyes to remember how you took me from being behind the sheep as a shepherd to be anointed king for your people by your prophet Samuel (1 Sam 16). Enlgihten me to escape the darkness of sadness, fear and despair that I was in. Enlighten my eyes lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, "I have prevailed against him." He will never prevail me as long as I am at Your sanctuary, Your right hand. Yet I will glorify you saying: “The right hand of the Lord does valiantly. The right hand of the Lord is exalted; The right hand of the Lord does valiantly. I shall not die, but live, And declare the works of the Lord.” (Ps 118:15-17). Then I will never say “How long will my enemy be exalted over me,” but rather will say: “I will praise You, For You have answered me, And have become my salvation” (Ps 118) “They have bowed down and fallen; But we have risen and stand upright” (Ps 20:8).

Enemies surround David but now he is not afraid of them because he trusts in God, who will not give him as prey to their teeth (Ps 124:6). Therefore he says: “Lest those who trouble me rejoice when I am moved. But I have trusted in Your mercy; My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.” Here he looks to his current circumstances in a practical and realistic way, seeing that half of the truth is that some are causing his troubles and are rejoicing in his fall, and the other half of it is that he trusted in God’s mercy that He will save him. David sees this salvation and rejoices. The end of the psalm is full of joy and salvation, which is totally opposite of the way it began. The bible was truthful when it said: “The end of a thing is better than its beginning” (Ec 7:8). And on the occasion of this phrase, we remember a similar story, in its beginning and its ending, which is the story of the righteous Joseph.

The story of the righteous Joseph started with pain, for his brothers had envied him and conspired against him; they cast him into a pit, then pulled him out and sold him to Ishmaelites for twenty sheckels of silver, then he was sold in Egypt to Potiphar (Gen 37). And in spite of the fact the Joseph was successful and loved the house of Potiphar, another conspiracy was set against him and he was put into prison (Gen 39).

Joseph stayed many years in prison, as if he were to pray the very phrase that David uttered: “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me?” But the Lord did not forget Joseph and He prepared two dreams of Egypt’s Pharaoh that Joseph interpreted. And he became "a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt.” (Gn 45:8) He became the second in charge of the kingdom “and without his consent no man may lift his hand or foot in all the land of Egypt.” (Gn 41:44)  Joseph's brothers came and bowed down before him.  The end of Joseph's story was better than its beginning. As if he says to the Lord as David said “My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, Because He has dealt bountifully with me”.

This psalm is also said during spiritual tribulations, when the believer feels that the Lord has forsaken him in his spiritual life and the enemy had triumph over him. When thoughts and ugly lusts have triumphed over him, and he falls and does not know how to rise and “the evil he wills not to do, that he practices” and “sees another law in his members, warring against the law of his mind, and bringing him into captivity to the law of sin which is in his members” (Rom 7:19, 23). Then, he cries to God and says: “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, Having sorrow in my heart daily? How long will my enemy be exalted over me?" When he sees his adversary the devil walking about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. (1 Pet 5:8), at that time he says: “Consider and hear me, O Lord my God; Enlighten my eyes, Lest I sleep the sleep of death; Lest my enemy say, "I have prevailed against him.”

This psalm gives us joy in hoping in God no matter how bad things get. And no matter how weak our spiritual life starts, and how sad and desperate, God will work for our salvation, if we trust in Him and we say to Him: “Consider and hear me.” At that time, the Lord's grace will work in us and we will respond to its work. And we will sing to the name of the Lord who is our benefactor and chant to the name of the Lord Most High. Alleluia.